Peaceful Happines and Pain

Hello!

It has been two weeks and I feel like I have a lot to say, but on the other hand I don't have any words to describe what is happening right now. So I will start with the easier part, which is talking about the Templestay I did last Weekend.
So on Saturday around midday we went to Beomeosa (범어사) Temple and changed into "temple-clothes", not what monks wear, but something very unappealing. (you will see it in the pictures) after greeting everyone, a huge group of foreigners, from all around the world (Switzerland, France, Kanada, USA...) 3 Korean Participants, the Staff and two monks, who showed us around and explained everything. So what do you do on a Templestay? You bow a lot (full body bows, with getting on your knees and everything) meditate a lot (all in all it was actually only 40 minutes, but it felt long) You will hear a lot about Buddah and Happiness. At first I was not so sure if I even want to do it, because I don't believe in Buddah's way to happiness nor am I too much into bowing, but since the people were nice to us and we joked around with the monks (the younger one has a better phone than me -.-')it was actually really great. About the bows, after doing a few I just started to think of them as an exercise and it was fun (even the 108 that we did in a row). Thinking and hearing about happiness makes me happy and i smile automatically, so I guess I spent most of my roughtly 24 hours at the temple smiling. Still not going to be a buddhist ^^

The pictures were taken by an almost professional photographer who studies traditional Korean medicine and Jennifer ^^

Now to what is harder to write. What is on my mind lately. Today the first of us (the exchangestudents) went back home. Almost all of us went to the airport to say good bye to her. We joked around and laughed until she really had to go. Whenever Madison hugged me she started sobbing. Her whole body was shaking in my arms. And i really don't know why but all the tears that wanted to come out before, went back and I did not cry. I miss her, she went to the same school as me and was like a little sister to me. Maybe I did not cry because I felt like I needed to protect her or not make her sadder than she already was. Her leaving makes me realize even more that the time in Korea will be over soon. I have 40 days left. And the closer I get to the day of my departure the more I miss my family and friends back home and the more I don't want to leave. It ripps me apart. I know that one part of me will always miss Korea, but if I come here the other part of me will miss home. I have found people, that I really really like a lot and I don't want to leave them. Also I started to love dance, and our teachers, I love being the foreigner... I don't know what will happen in the future, where I will be, what I will do... I can only hope that I will be happy. Which I will be. I have a feeling that I will ^^ Even though i am writing very depressed right now, my normal state is still happy. I still laugh a lot, smile, jump around, play, am stupid.. you know just me.. But today is just too much, with Madison going, everyone crying and it being the night of another ball ("prom") of my old school back home in Austria that I am going to miss. I wish they had school dances here.. ^^
I will stop writing here for today... See you soon
Love Maria (check the video box for videos from sunday)

11